Wednesday, 27 August 2014

HAPPY KENKE DAY


The benefits of being the queen of a great kingdom such as mine are unquantifiable. I, being the queen of my Kingdom, sat on my throne and watched the world’s grandest parade. I was blown away by it all, not particularly by the performance but by the cause (you know, the reason for the ‘season’ *winks*). It was a MEcause. Yes, today the 27th of August is my birthday and the whole kingdom is out to celebrate me, ME! JUST ME! ONLY ME! *dancing yahoozee*. What more could a queen ask for? Ehn? *blushes*


So much love for the queen  \^.^/
Fast forwforward to reality.

Yes, today is the 27th of August and it really is my birthday. Nope, I’m not telling you amebo lot my age (hin no consine you!). A lady never reveals her age. Unfortunately, there is no great kingdom I rule over and ultimately, no grand parade to celebrate my birthday *sad face*. Birthdays should be the best days of the year and so should today be for me. Now, this is where you come in (listen o, this one consine you), I have a wish list and I’m hoping you’d be so kind as to help fulfil some of the wishes if not all of them (I must get my wishes before the day runs out o, ehen). Before I go on, I would like to point out that I’m a ridiculously reasonable person and very considerate too. So, my list is going to be short so as to spare your pockets. Here goes;

I want an island. Specifically a diamond shaped island adjacent to Brad Pitt’s heart shaped island. This is so that when I go on vacation and I’m sunbathing in the buff on my island, Brad Pitt may look upon me lustfully, swim across and propose marriage to me. Then we can start our little volleyball team together and Brad will be a modern day Abraham; the father of many nations.
I want my signature scent.


I want Clive Christian Imperial Majesty. Hehe. It’s always been a dream of mine to have my perfume delivered by a Rolls Royce you know and a chauffeur and a diamond on the bottle.

A Majestic scent for a Royal me \$_$/

I want a pair or maybe two or even three pairs of shoes. Nothing too exorbitant. I would only accept three designers sha; Manolo Blahnik, Jimmy Choo and Christian Louboutin.

See, I told you I was reasonable. Please use super-fast courier services when necessary. Time is fast ticking. What can I say, Time is impatient like that; he is a spoilt little brat!

While I await the delivery of the gifts, I’ll catch some rest to prepare my body, soul and spirit for another hectic day *arghh, med school! Despite the strike, it’s still hectic* (explains why we, Fikemi being the 2nd person, have been silent for a while).

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME. CONGRATULATIONS TO MIZKENKE.
Enjoy the rest of your day people cause I plan to enjoy mine (with your gifts) *winks*.
Fikemi says hi, she had to hurry down to Farfar-away Land.
Again, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME.

00:30:27 27-08-2014

Tuesday, 29 July 2014

Roses are Red

Roses are red
Violets are blue
I woke up renewed
And beautiful too

All thanks to God
For being so good
So good to me
And also to you

Good day everyone.  I hope you liked my special way of saying 'Hi'.
Eid Mubarak to all the muslim faithfuls.
I'm enjoying the holiday; two awesome days of no school. Life can be good sometimes *lol*
I hope you are making good use of this time to rest and unwind. Enjoy while you can, school continues tomorrow.

I apologize,  I know it's been a while. We have been so so busy with school work.
That's all for now. Enjoy!!!

Haha!, a picture to feed your eyes with ;)

"Roses" are Red

Sunday, 13 July 2014

Sunday Late Post

Sigh* I'm not exactly happy right now cause it seems the team I'm supporting is going to lose the world cup. It'll take a miracle for Argentina to equalize in less than 5 minutes to the end of the match. I just entered my room more angry than sad...*hears happy voices* *runs outside to confirm if Argentina has equalized*...mschewwww, turns out some people were just excitedly counting down to the end of the match. Referee blows final whistle and I walk away heartbroken. Mizkenke begs me to stay. She wants to watch Messi cry she said. Hmmmph! Insensitive she. *Long hiss*

Anyhoo, I promised me and Amaka that I was going to post something today and that's the only reason I'm doing this. Otherwise, I should be mourning my 'loss' with the sun cause even she is sad Argentina lost; the exact reason she has refused to let her rays falll upon this part of the world tonight.

Soooooooooo, eeerrrrrrr, there really isn't much to say or type (more appropriately). I am really tired. I travelled down to school from home and I spent half the time in the bus reminding God I had not yet fulfilled my purpose in life and the other half laughing at the reckless-driving-yet-confused driver. (Yes o, the man just bad like that. Gbam!) Less than an hour after I dropped my bag in my room, my friend called me and me do his dirty job. He used me, insulted and manipulated me. Yet, he showed no obvious signs of appreciation. Things we I do love ehn.

Walking back to my room I was thinking of what to post when I was almost certain I spotted a flower. I decided to take a picture though it was 8pm and pretty dark, I sblindly took the shot of the spot; call that a Blind Spot (P.S. I did not type that. Some villain did. I'm too smart to even think of thinking such. Blind spot? Hian!).

Not bad for a blind spot, yeah? That was the villain again


I feel better now that I'm picturing someone smiling at my almost dry jokes (if you have not so far, please do. You'll be saving someone's life. DON'T ASK WHO!). I'm already typing bonkers yeah? I should sleep yeah? Okay, Okay, say no more. Good night good people of earth. I shall be back.

Taaa ta ran ran taaan ta raaaaan.
Cu...

Wait, wait, wait.
I want to use this medium to wish Amaka Hundeyin of www.seyonhundeyin.blogspot.comwww.seyonhundeyin.blogspot.com a happy birthday. We from femmefuntale wish you the very very best of life. God bless you hunnie. Please send our share of the cake to us. Thank you for your anticipated cooperation.

Taaa ta ran ran taaan ta raaaaan.
Cut!

Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Behind the cloud

Hi guys, remember I wrote about my interest in photography last year, phoneography to be precise (till I can afford a camera sha). Well, I have been taking pictures every now and then. There is almost always a story to the pictures I take and this one I'm about to share is no exception.

Some weeks back, Kenke and I were informed by the CIA that alien activities had been spotted in the very heart of Ibadan city. We questioned the credibility of the information at first. Why did the CIA contact us and not the Secret Service or something? Then we gave it a second thought, the CIA must have recognized the strength of our mind which invariably radiates to every aspect of our being so we decided to check it out.

We set out on a Saturday when it was reported alien activity was usually at its peak. We went up the hills, down the valleys, climbed up rocks and even swam against strong  river currents. We got to the final obstacle, a forest so thick even a piece of thread would find it almost impossible to pass through. We had been through too much to quit so we sought extraterrestrial help. In a flash, we were riding on a Unicorn over the forest and minutes later we spotted an area of crude civilization. We watched the aliens use some machine to suck the sun's energy. The sun was visibly scared and had no where to run. She started crying for help. Kenke and I were about to rescue her when we saw it. A very beautiful scenery.  The beauty of helping the needy. The beauty of going out of your way to lend a helping a hand. The act of putting others before yourself without any hope of a reward. The cloud so brave, so courageous, shielded the sun from the aliens and in that moment of selflessness, a radiant energy from the cloud coupled with that of the sun shot high into the sky and descended on the alien civilization. The energy was so bright we had to cover our faces and when we opened our eyes, the whole area was razed to ashes. It was over. The alien threat taken care of and most importantly, I was able to get a shot of the sun's rays fanning out from behind the cloud.

Too bad we can't boast of saving the world but hey, we witnessed the world being saved; a rare opportunity *winks*. Don't hate the players, hate the game. Hehehee. Oh yeah, here's the shot I got.

Beautiful innit?



Enjoy the rest of your day people. I'm out!.

Saturday, 5 July 2014

BIG BAD MIGHTY M

Back in the day, say four years ago, two young na├»ve girls on the verge of womanhood decided to be altruistic and save the world, one sick person at a time. They filled in Medicine and Surgery on their JAMB/UTME form, got admitted into the University of Ibadan and were hailed as efiwes and efikos. Of course, they basked in the euphoria of their admission to study medicine.

THEN THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENED…

They did not see it coming, they did not sense it, it was the last thing they anticipated. When they least expected  it, these girls were kidnapped.
HORROR!
Shown no mercy by their captor, Mighty M, the girls were dealt a heavy blow physically, psychologically, socially and financially.
TERROR!

The mean looking Mighty M

They were held captive for 18 months but were rescued on the last day of the 18th month by prince ASUU.
FREEDOM!

Charming prince ASUU

For the few months they were able to escape captivity, they started a communication with the outside world in form of a blog .Then their captor returned. Bigger, meaner and better equipped to deal with the runaways. Infact, Mighty M did not provide allowance for escape a second time. Escape in form of weekends, sick days, public holidays, strikes; nada! These girls had none. Hey you, do not fear for them because in them was  recently born one of the greatest weapons of mankind against adversaries. DETERMINATION!The girls are now bigger, meaner and better too. Though they live in captivity, they have decided Mighty Med would cease to dictate the terms of their captivity. They are determined to call the shots, there is no way Mighty M is going to shut them away from the world. He tried it before but never again. It is now a matter of life and death, a fight to the finish and these girls do not plan to go down in this fight. HEROIC!These girls are…drumroll… Fikemi and Me (MizKenke).  Our horror tale is real and the villain is Medicine. A bit anticlimactic I know but wait… Medicine sucks the life out of you. It’s like the yeerks from animorphs. It enters your brain. Takes over your life. Medicine makes you a whiner and a liar. When you try to eat, alarms go off in your head. Sirens too. ‘You should be reading’ they say. When you play or pray or even sleep, you hear the alarms and sirens. The worst part is even when you are reading. The darned alarms won’t go off. This time, they are going on and on about how you are behind in your reading and how your mates are going to cantab you (pass you when reading the 2nd time while you are still slugging through your 1st).  The only time you get a respite is when you are complaining. That’s right.  Complaining. So don’t be surprised when all (okay, maybe not all) we do is complain about the workload. We always lie that we will do better. We lie that we will study more, if anything, we study less. We lie that we will keep in touch, we never do. We say that we will blog more, this is a lie too. But like I said, we are back; bigger, better, meaner, genetically modified to dictate the terms of our captivity. So,this is us hoping that our apology is accepted and promising never ever ever ever to leave you.


MizKenke and Fikemi - looking fierce and equipped to take down Mighty M *grrrrrr* 


*sniffs* Poignant moment.

Saturday, 8 February 2014

ONNELLISTA UUTTA VUOTA

Onnellista Uutta Vuota!  
Don't worry your heads (or google) trying to figure out the meaning. It's simply the foreign manner I have chosen to say Happy New Year!
   
Happy new year in February? I know, I know and I'm sorry. Forgive us for going AWOL. Something came up, the unexpected occured. Mizkenke and I had to combat the unseen to ensure  balance in our world. Credit to the Almighty, Victory is ours.

That said, we have missed y'all just as we hoped you've missed us. Being the first post this new year, I'd like to wish everybody a wonderful year. I hope January was awesome for you all. Not so? Smile and be happy for you still have 10months and three weeks ahead of you.

What to expect from us? Everything and Anything!  Unpredictability is the spice of life. But one thing is certain, we promise to make you smile (laugh maybe), ruminate, challenge you, enlighten you, and share things with you (yes, you are that important). So bookmark the blog address or subscribe by email and journey with us. It promises to be worthwhile.
Errrr, I think that'll be all for now. Oh no, wait! You know this is our means of communicating with you guys and communication is a two way thing. So, please endeavour to leave a comment and if you have anything to share, questions, do send us a mail (femmefuntale@gmail.com).Thank you.
Have a good day people.

Peace!